your mom calls and asks if she can watch the kiddos and you scream: YYYEEESSSSSS!!!!! before she can get her words out...AND...have the bags packed before she gets to the door to pick them up!
you opt to finish your next round of knit and purl stitches on the hat you are knitting instead of taking a shower and putting on makeup.
your date consists of subway, a cookie, and a trip to the liquor store for a bottle of wine.
you both goob out over the fact that for the first time in over four years you get to watch HOUSE on your own tv via the newly purchased cable!
after HOUSE you start knitting again while your darling OA finishes up doing the taxes.
he winks, pours you both one more glass of wine, and goes to take a bath...you blog...and smile...knowing most likely that you will both be snoring in about thirty minutes!!
i love this almost-decade. this last year of marriage has by far been my favorite.
deep warm snuggly sigh.
and i cannot lie...he is still very very HOT!
My Quivers
Monday, January 25, 2010
Friday, January 22, 2010
tired ramblings
I am off to bed, as I have a ten mile run ahead of me in the morning.
It has been an exceptionally fast week. I think the part that I want to remember the most about this week was today: OA and the kiddos walking into the school (unexpectedly) where I work part-time and me momentarily losing my breath.
My family literally takes my breath away. I am so unworthy of the blessings that I am given. May I breathe them in...and back out again...sharing as much of His Love with my fellow man as possible.
There is something about opening your heart up...especially when it is a Love of Choice...not a love of necessity or guilt or obligation. I am quite sure that is why He gave us Free Will.
Chosen Love...the kind of Love that stirs within.
It has been an exceptionally fast week. I think the part that I want to remember the most about this week was today: OA and the kiddos walking into the school (unexpectedly) where I work part-time and me momentarily losing my breath.
My family literally takes my breath away. I am so unworthy of the blessings that I am given. May I breathe them in...and back out again...sharing as much of His Love with my fellow man as possible.
There is something about opening your heart up...especially when it is a Love of Choice...not a love of necessity or guilt or obligation. I am quite sure that is why He gave us Free Will.
Chosen Love...the kind of Love that stirs within.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Fencing
So tonight I took my kiddos to a fencing class. We were able to meet our very best friends who were also giving it a try. It's in a big church gymnasium of sorts; to be honest, I was floored at the amount of people who were interested in fencing.
As we were walking in, J-bob started doing some very weird-very serious stretching-pausing-stretching-facial-grimacing poses. I was immediately reminded of Napoleon Dynamite and didn't know whether I should burst into tears or peeling laughter. That boy of mine.
The class required alot of blocking out other sensory stimuli, lots of verbal multi-step commands, repetition, uncomfortable stances, and losing a fencing version of "Simon says". All in all...with only a very small heart breakingly disappointed reaction to getting out early on in the game...J-bob did beyond my expectations!!
Mermaid was adorable. The smallest, shyest, sweetest little princess...who may have very well fallen in love with the sport of fencing tonight. She was asking if it could become apart of our school routine. Oh, how I love home schooling.
I was instantly reminded of how young my "small packages" still are. They seem so grown up to me these days. I was very thankful for God's gift of tender reminders that my babies are still my babies...despite their every growing shoe size.
There was an incredible young man...I am guessing maybe twelve or a bit older...poor boy...stuck in the newbies group with us misfits...he gave me hope. He was chivalrous, kind, and down right enjoyable.
Big Warm Sigh.
I almost feel guilty...having such an incredible night while so many are suffering devastation in Haiti. May God wrap His arm of peace and love around them all this evening.
As we were walking in, J-bob started doing some very weird-very serious stretching-pausing-stretching-facial-grimacing poses. I was immediately reminded of Napoleon Dynamite and didn't know whether I should burst into tears or peeling laughter. That boy of mine.
The class required alot of blocking out other sensory stimuli, lots of verbal multi-step commands, repetition, uncomfortable stances, and losing a fencing version of "Simon says". All in all...with only a very small heart breakingly disappointed reaction to getting out early on in the game...J-bob did beyond my expectations!!
Mermaid was adorable. The smallest, shyest, sweetest little princess...who may have very well fallen in love with the sport of fencing tonight. She was asking if it could become apart of our school routine. Oh, how I love home schooling.
I was instantly reminded of how young my "small packages" still are. They seem so grown up to me these days. I was very thankful for God's gift of tender reminders that my babies are still my babies...despite their every growing shoe size.
There was an incredible young man...I am guessing maybe twelve or a bit older...poor boy...stuck in the newbies group with us misfits...he gave me hope. He was chivalrous, kind, and down right enjoyable.
Big Warm Sigh.
I almost feel guilty...having such an incredible night while so many are suffering devastation in Haiti. May God wrap His arm of peace and love around them all this evening.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
2010
Holy cow where has all of the time gone?
Well...my last post was a mommy meltdown pity party extraordinairre...and I promise it was almost immediately better the moment I prayed. But man-o-man-man can the holidays be daunting!!
I have completed my first semester of homeschooling and still have all of my hair. Actually, it has brought a peace to our lives beyond any explanation. I do believe that if you have continued issues homeschooling, then you need to evaluate your expectations versus methods. I am becoming quite the Charlotte Mason snob. That is for an entirely separate post, but the bottom line is my children are being introduced to a Real and Living God and the icing on the cake is that they are also being introduced to a real and living life of learning. The spark has been ignited...in just four short months; from here on out, I am simply responsible for fanning the flame. It is by far the most rewarding and exciting thing that I have ever done.
ANYHOO...just to update...OA is enjoying his job...and providing so nicely for our family who has learned the art of embracing quality time with eachother over consumerism and over provision.
I have taken on sewing in which I have fallen IN LOVE. I hope to post some pics, soon. In addition to pics...there are some INCREDIBLE sewing blogs out there...I mean...really...sewing chics are just plain cool! I also work three hours a day at Merci's old Montessori preschool...oh yeah, and I am training for another half marathon...oh yeah, and I am...learning to simplify! HA
Jay-bob is loving school. He has been heard saying the following: Can we go to the library? I love to read. Will you read _____ to me mommy? Math is so cool. I love God, and Jesus, and everyone in the whole entire world. ((that boy breaks my heart daily with his tenderness))
Mermaid is also loving school. Already reading...of course she does it all early. She just turned five years old. DEEP HEARTFELT SIGH. She has stolen my heart. She loves sewing, too. She sits with a box of scrap fabrics and pins and creates clothes for her Barbie and of course because she is my child Optimus Prime (transformer). She and I were looking at fabrics together on the computer and it was incredible her taste (sweet dainty roses and PINK) versus my taste (retro birds and anything BUT PINK). She started altering her taste to mine so we had to pause and have a mini-lesson on being true to ourselves and how it makes me appreciate who she is even more when she is different from me. ANOTHER DEEP SIGH.
2009 was incredibly educational for my family. We altered so much of our lives and really shifted into a new way of thinking. Our shift has been one that has created a family that is not only loving God...but obeying Him, too. It has been one of the most fullfilling decisions we have ever made. I do not fear 2010...I embrace all that it will bring...the good...the bad...and everything in between.
Well...my last post was a mommy meltdown pity party extraordinairre...and I promise it was almost immediately better the moment I prayed. But man-o-man-man can the holidays be daunting!!
I have completed my first semester of homeschooling and still have all of my hair. Actually, it has brought a peace to our lives beyond any explanation. I do believe that if you have continued issues homeschooling, then you need to evaluate your expectations versus methods. I am becoming quite the Charlotte Mason snob. That is for an entirely separate post, but the bottom line is my children are being introduced to a Real and Living God and the icing on the cake is that they are also being introduced to a real and living life of learning. The spark has been ignited...in just four short months; from here on out, I am simply responsible for fanning the flame. It is by far the most rewarding and exciting thing that I have ever done.
ANYHOO...just to update...OA is enjoying his job...and providing so nicely for our family who has learned the art of embracing quality time with eachother over consumerism and over provision.
I have taken on sewing in which I have fallen IN LOVE. I hope to post some pics, soon. In addition to pics...there are some INCREDIBLE sewing blogs out there...I mean...really...sewing chics are just plain cool! I also work three hours a day at Merci's old Montessori preschool...oh yeah, and I am training for another half marathon...oh yeah, and I am...learning to simplify! HA
Jay-bob is loving school. He has been heard saying the following: Can we go to the library? I love to read. Will you read _____ to me mommy? Math is so cool. I love God, and Jesus, and everyone in the whole entire world. ((that boy breaks my heart daily with his tenderness))
Mermaid is also loving school. Already reading...of course she does it all early. She just turned five years old. DEEP HEARTFELT SIGH. She has stolen my heart. She loves sewing, too. She sits with a box of scrap fabrics and pins and creates clothes for her Barbie and of course because she is my child Optimus Prime (transformer). She and I were looking at fabrics together on the computer and it was incredible her taste (sweet dainty roses and PINK) versus my taste (retro birds and anything BUT PINK). She started altering her taste to mine so we had to pause and have a mini-lesson on being true to ourselves and how it makes me appreciate who she is even more when she is different from me. ANOTHER DEEP SIGH.
2009 was incredibly educational for my family. We altered so much of our lives and really shifted into a new way of thinking. Our shift has been one that has created a family that is not only loving God...but obeying Him, too. It has been one of the most fullfilling decisions we have ever made. I do not fear 2010...I embrace all that it will bring...the good...the bad...and everything in between.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
holiday screams
i must first say that we just had a remarkable 10 day family "staycation". it was sheer bliss.
that is probably why today is feeling so IMPOSSIBLE.
i used to love the holidays. i still love the idea of them...but with a special needs child...especially one whom you often forget has special needs...holidays have begun to sting a little.
they are a time when the whole world gets together and eats delicious junk while my kiddos watch...and i am constantly having to justify the fact that...yes...just one bite does make a difference...so go eat your crap...gain your 10 pounds and LEAVE US ALONE!!
they are a time when families get together and then begins the small slaps in the face as you watch the other children in the family slowly surpass your child's maturity...(which only infuriates you that you notice...and further frustrates you that you give a damn...)just yesterday you were marveling at the "gift of autism" in that almost no other child has the impeccable manners of your son...just yesterday tears were spilling over your eyes because God has given you such an incredible blessing...to include autism...because your child has a real and living relationship with the King of the Universe...just yesterday...everything was perfect.
it's the sudden snap...that one startling meltdown...just one missing piece of the puzzle that can send a day, a week, or a month into a tail spin.
it's as simple as eating marshmellows (food dye) on vacation, daddy going back to work, the "flexing" of the schedule...and then there's the get-togethers...the extra play dates...
and in between being a good daughter, grand daughter, sister, wife, and friend...somewhere sandwiched in the midst of all of that...being the mom of a special needs child gets lost...lost to those who don't see behind the scenes...
so for this very moment...i am wallowing in a bit of self pity...please just indulge me by looking the other way...saying a prayer...giving me a hug...not saying a word.
in a few minutes i will be composed...we will leave our house...greet the world with our smiles and laughter...and continue letting almost all who know us believe that living with autism is actually easy.
for the other families with life-out-side-the-box...i am praying for you...as holidays can be so incredibly difficult for our little and not so little ones. and together i raise my voice with yours in a good-old-fashioned-holiday-scream!!
that is probably why today is feeling so IMPOSSIBLE.
i used to love the holidays. i still love the idea of them...but with a special needs child...especially one whom you often forget has special needs...holidays have begun to sting a little.
they are a time when the whole world gets together and eats delicious junk while my kiddos watch...and i am constantly having to justify the fact that...yes...just one bite does make a difference...so go eat your crap...gain your 10 pounds and LEAVE US ALONE!!
they are a time when families get together and then begins the small slaps in the face as you watch the other children in the family slowly surpass your child's maturity...(which only infuriates you that you notice...and further frustrates you that you give a damn...)just yesterday you were marveling at the "gift of autism" in that almost no other child has the impeccable manners of your son...just yesterday tears were spilling over your eyes because God has given you such an incredible blessing...to include autism...because your child has a real and living relationship with the King of the Universe...just yesterday...everything was perfect.
it's the sudden snap...that one startling meltdown...just one missing piece of the puzzle that can send a day, a week, or a month into a tail spin.
it's as simple as eating marshmellows (food dye) on vacation, daddy going back to work, the "flexing" of the schedule...and then there's the get-togethers...the extra play dates...
and in between being a good daughter, grand daughter, sister, wife, and friend...somewhere sandwiched in the midst of all of that...being the mom of a special needs child gets lost...lost to those who don't see behind the scenes...
so for this very moment...i am wallowing in a bit of self pity...please just indulge me by looking the other way...saying a prayer...giving me a hug...not saying a word.
in a few minutes i will be composed...we will leave our house...greet the world with our smiles and laughter...and continue letting almost all who know us believe that living with autism is actually easy.
for the other families with life-out-side-the-box...i am praying for you...as holidays can be so incredibly difficult for our little and not so little ones. and together i raise my voice with yours in a good-old-fashioned-holiday-scream!!
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