Wow and a rather long announcement

I have really been trying to figure out how to "announce" this.  It's so personal and yet so vital that others are apart of this journey as it's really a commandment for all of us in one way or another.  What on EARTH am I blathering on about now?  Dairy?  Red 40?  Autism?  Marriage?  The kids?

Well, yes.

And, no.

And everything in between.

The "wow" from my title comes from my re-reading an entry that I had written in June of 2009:  Foster parenting.  There are just so many reasons to "wow" the re-reading of my own prayers from the past.  It's been nearly THREE years since I posted that.  I attended the class.  I received tons of information in the mail--- many of which had pictures of adorable third-world country babies posted all over it to which my adorable kiddos would beg of me to please bring home.  It would nearly rip my heart into pieces.  I finally just stopped asking.  I even stopped praying for it (well...mostly), resolving myself to the fact that it was not my husband's desire. He is usually always right when it comes to big life decisions. 

Periodically he would come home and bring up having my tubal reversed so that we could try to have more children.  Something inside him was stirring.  I love how subtle God can be.

Fast forward to a few months ago.  I posted the post:  Ummm...wow...it's already been a YEAR?

Apparently, my Hero read my post.  Apparently, he started to really pray and ask God what His will was for our family.  Apparently, he started talking about it and asking questions at work.  Apparently, his heart was slowly changing.  Apparently, he called his parents to let them know we were considering and would be taking first steps...which was when I realized:  this is really happening.

I immediately removed any and all distractions from my life and began to pour myself into God's word and several recommended books.  I can't really explain the eerie transformation that has occurred within my family in this very short time (or shall I say over the last three years).  There's a newness...or rather...an old familiarity to God being the very center of our lives and it is an amazing place to be.

I still say bad words, I still have bad thoughts, I still cling to every single drop of precious blood that He shed for my daily sins...but...I also savor the redemption and restoration He promises and offers.

By no means do we think that our future will be easy.  Actually, we are quite aware of just how close to hell parenting can bring us.  My only explanation lies in one afternoon's and one evening's events and a heart desperate for wanting to do His will.  I was watching my Hero build a huge stick fort in our backyard with the kiddos. I couldn't shake the gnawing realization that what we have should be shared with those who have not (kind of freaked me out reading nearly the same thoughts penned 3 years ago); and in the wee hours of a few evenings later, my Hero echoed those exact sentiments (I had not shared those thoughts with him).  We realized that God had written the same thing across each of our hearts.  So whether we are crazy, or sane, or terrified, or ecstatic or all of them in one, we are taking the plunge into the world of foster-adoption.

"If God has been generous with you, he will expect you to serve him well.  But if he has been more than generous, he will expect you to serve him even better."   Luke 12:48 CEV

"If you try to save your life, you will lose it.  But if you give it up for me, you will surely find it."  Matthew 10:39 CEV