autism awareness month

Why do strangers assume i am rude
can they not see my smiling eyes?
can they not hear my silent voice

whispering
calling
begging:

do not judge me...i am not a bad child...
i want to express myself properly...

do you think i like hearing noises no one else can hear?
fixating on a sound
(drip, drip, drip)
searing my brain with frustration-I CANNOT HANDLE IT-

i cover my ears...it doesn't help...
(drip, drip, drip)
my head begins to shake...i clinch my ears harder...
(drip, drip, drip)
doesn't anyone else hear that sound??!!

Finally, i scream and scream-at last-
(relief)
my own scream drowns the unrelenting sound....

my voice...no longer silent...

why do they stare?
do they not understand?
will they ever understand?
if only i could silently scream...


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april is autism awareness month...let's spend this month loving those with differences a little more...and judging those who cannot communicate to society's standards a little less...

sometimes...i think the jay-miester has a better world than many...as he typically doesn't realize when others are ridiculing him...as his diet and supplements coupled with his therapies begin to recover him...his heart has begun to pick up on the mean-ness of others a bit more often...his compassion is always sincere...a bit over the top at times...but never manufactured...when he experiences a social injustice lately...he pulls his hands into his chest...clinches his fists...his body shakes with frustration: i am soooo angrwy...uuurrrhhhhh....

i love his honesty...his inability to fake his way through life...it's quite refreshing...again...let's spend this month embracing the uniqueness of others...individualtiy...isn't that what our society screams for?